6/26/09 Wow, it's been some time since I've updated this section. I just got an email from a Mark in Australia, which caused me to look here again. He mentioned a 'new beginnings', I can't find it. This March, 2009 I started going with Steve, to Vineyard Church North, a church where Steve goes to the men's group. I my right arm out of the cast but still had the left arm in a cast. The wife of the guy that Steve knew came over and we started talking. She told me of this women's Bible study she was going too and asked if I wanted to come along. She said it was for marriages. I went. It's based on Titus 2. 3-5. The only place in the Bible where a woman is told to love her husband. [not just respect him] WOW what a difference it made in my life in 2 short weeks. That's how long the Spring break was from the 1st time I went. Lots to think about. Lots of things and thoughts and feelings to work thru. If you are reading this, you are having problems in your marriage. Who doesn't at one time or another? [or all the time] Go to their website: Christown. Get the teachings and whatever else you can and listen to them. Let me say this. If you read these pages, you will KNOW I've been thru the wringer on this marriage. I KNOW what I am talking about. That Bible study, along with God, has CHANGED MY LIFE. It has NOT changed Steve, it has changed ME. It has taught me how to forgive more readily, consequently how to have less stress; how to speak to Steve, to entreat; how to think, not just...you are to think this way, but HOW to come to that action. HOW to accomplish that feat. Naomi started this Bible study FIFTY years ago. Every single week during the school year, that school is in. Her husband also had one for men before he passed up. So I'm sure there's stuff for men that is available too. The hardest part was getting to the point where it's ME that has to change. Even though I've changed SO MUCH already, even though Steve does nothing STILL. If you are woman, get to that site, NOW. If you are male...I just emailed Naomi to see if any of her hubby's teachings are available. Back to me. 6 months into a few paragraphs. I tripped over the hose Jan. 18, 2009, fell face down on the concrete, breaking both hands. Had bruises coming on my forehead for 2 months later, BUT GOD. God had His hands in front of my face when I fell. In my face: No bones were broken, no hemorrhages, no fractures, no eye popping out of the socket, no concussion. My friends...I had NO headache, ever. All that happened was I broke the 5th metacarpal at the wrist in right hand, and broke the bone across from inside to outside on left. I just went to a different orthopedic doctor and he said it looks like there was a fracture of the wrist in the left also. A cast on the right for 3 weeks, a direct answer from God to have my right hand free, and a cast on the left for 6 weeks. I had to hold the left arm up the whole time, to make sure the bone didn't move. Here it is June 29, 2009. I had a cortisone shot in my left shoulder for pain last Tuesday. I had NO IDEA it was that painful after the shot. However today, there is less pain when I move the shoulder. The physical therapist says the left hand is pretty much were it will always be. I don't accept that. The new Ortho, Dr. Tseng [Sang], said in 9 months, after I got the casts off, that's where my wrist will be. So I've got 6 months left to work it WORK IT WORK IT. Prayer from you would be appreciated. For twisting and flexing motions. as in, palm UP, and hand BACK. I also have a severe overgrowth of candida [yeast]. Prayer would help also in the arena of eating correctly. All fresh, healthy, whole grains. No sugar, processed foods, red meat [very little of that anyway]. It's a difficult way to eat when one has TMJ, dentures, and has not eaten healthy as a way of life. Steve helped tremendously the first 3 weeks I had both hands in casts. Heck, I couldn't scratch, feed or clothe myself! When I got the right hand cast off, he quit helping. Now I have to ask him to do things he should know I can't do. He's never had a child, never had to care for anyone. So he didn't know how to wipe, blow, brush or tie. And he doesn't use his head, thinking...'I don't like my socks cock-eyed, I shouldn't put them on her that way'. I am struggling to stop calling him names. I have quit, thanks be to God, calling him Dick. That's my Dad's name, not Steve's. [it was half a word yanno?] I still call him jack, half a word for jackass. But it's a LOT better than Dick! I am working on not being controlling, not cussing, not getting angry so quickly, letting things go. Giving him more time to let things sink into his brain, he said it takes like 30 seconds to get in before he can respond. That's a LONG time to me! I am quick witted, he is not. I am working on eating right, for healthy bones [osteoporosis], candida and a healthy colon [diverticulosis] God HEALED the hemorrhoids that were in my sigmoid colon. [colonscopy in April] I'm working on getting my shoulder back to normal, getting my wrists to bend and open jars and doors, remembering to take my supplements, drink 8 glasses of water a day and being a nice person. I'm trying to make good use of my time. So far I've failed at that. And I'm trying to get Steve to change. To want to change. To care about me, be interested in me and others. You know how that's gone too. back