Oh, woe is me! I've come undone! Yesterday, Feb. 21, 2006, I was pondering words. For the past several days, the term 'honey' had been popping up in my mind. So yesterday, I was practicing at home, calling Steve 'honey' out loud and seeing how it felt. I came to the conclusion that people that call each other 'honey' are more together, more loving, more married. [This was just the prelude to what Jesus was going to show me!] So before we went to bed last nite I remembered about this word and told Steve what I had been thinking. I asked him to call me 'honey' and I would do the same. He said it made sense, and agreed. So while in bed I was contemplating a prophetic Word we had received. One of the parts was that Steve and I would be 'best friends'. Another part said we would walk in harmony and we need to be a team and when one person is out of step the team can't function very well. Holy Spirit showed me that it is me that hasn't been a team player. It's been ME that has been marching to her own drummer. It's been Steve that IS a team player. He does this and that, helps with this and that. I have always thought that because I'm older and know more and am more responsible, that I was better than he was. Oh geeeeez, I dunno if I'll put this online. {I just looked at the stats, not many come to this site and read it anyway. [even Steve] Why DID God tell me to put all this online? To be 'transparent' he said. To help maybe one other person. Maybe in the future it will help someone. God knows} I just learned last night, that it's ME that is wrong. It's ME that's not a team player. It's ME that's walked to a different drum all my life. My father walked to a different drum and got by in life, [but 'just' got by]. There's lotsa people that walk to different drums. But there's a difference between walking to a different drum and being a nice person and walking to a different drum and 'lording it over someone[s]'. I have 'lorded it over Steve'. He was drawn to me before we were married because of my strong personality. Well, until last nite, this 'strong personality' has been that, and done that. Been strong. It took me a while to fall asleep last nite after I realized this. It's not so horrible for me, as it is eye-opening. I had NO IDEA that it was ME not walking as a team. And while I have done things as a team, like cleaning the spa, vacumming the pool, [the automatic vacumm is broken], stuff that is his job; I've, most times, said something about it. Mostly letting him know in a nice way I did it. But sometimes complaining that I did HIS job. Geeezmakneeslouise! If STEVE had done the same thing over the years, he would still be talking about how he's done MY work, MY stuff! I repent of my highhandedness, my selfishness, my haughty, 'better than thou' attitude. Now I have to discover what team members do, how they do it. And don't forget to call him 'honey'. BACK Pretty background huh? I have no clue where I got it. You can copy it. To learn more about me and what I do, you could visit Blue Sage Naturals sea buckthorn oil page