|
12-14-05
Well, I went thru a session with Scott and Liz on Monday, for more inner healing and deliverance. One of the evil spirits that was there, was fear. I think 'fear' has a lot of faces, don't you? Since yesterday was a very hard day for me, I decided early this morning to fast til noon and to spent an hour with the Lord. This is something I've gradually gotten away from lately. It's so easy isn't it? So I was praising, singing with Hillsong and telling God how much I love him. One of the fun/loving things my hubby Steve and I do, is that 'I love you more than' thing. We try to come up with a new one each time we do this. Well, a few months back, I thought, we ought to do this with God too. If WE like it, he certainly will! So I began to give God my best one, which is, 'I love you more than all the petals on all the flowers in the world, past, present and to come'. As I got to 'I love you God more than all the petals...' GOD said, "I love YOU more than all the petals on the flowers I've created in all the world past, present and to come too"! I sat there stunned, just soaking in the realization of God's love for me. And HOW better could I have understood his love for ME, than for him to give me back the BEST one. I GET IT NOW. I understand HOW MUCH He loves me! God put his hands on each side of my face and rubbed noses with me. So, I'm still worshipping with Hillsong on my CD player and a lyric goes by that says, 'I will be still - know you are God'. I heard it the first time, as 'I will be still - for you are God'. Slight, but there is a difference there. For me anyway. I got up and worshipped God and put the Glory ring I made on my head and felt like God's girl, God's daughter, God's princess, God's. I began to worship God again. In the session we went back to me at age 12, then age 4, then some other young age. There was a lot of stuff that happened to me. A lot of fear came in me, in those ages. I always thought inside me, you know, that place where fear gets in? That I would succumb to fear, I would succumb to the evil, so I HAD to be in control. So I've been a controlling person as long as I can remember. WELL! I have recently learned about predestination, how we are CHOSEN by God, to be his. It's not about 'free will' [no such thing in the Bible], but about whom God chooses, whom he predestinates. So, understanding this, finally, the Holy Spirit showed me... I AM GOD'S DAUGHTER. He's had me from the BEGINNING! PREDESTINED. So the enemy tried to steal what was God's before I made the decision. But since I have belonged to God before I was born, Satan couldn't have me. So I have learned. I WILL NOT, I CAN NOT SUCCUMB TO THE EVIL. I AM GOD'S!!!!!!!!!!!! Fear thought he had me. And I THOUGHT he did too! |